Life Coaching
How to Create the Life of Your Dreams
By Diane Randall
Feb 26, 2009, 22:34

Dory was hesitant, full of doubts. A 46-year-old divorced mother of two, who spent the last 25 years working as an account technician for a major mail distribution center, she feared perhaps it was too late, she was too old, and didn’t have the energy or time to create a fulfilling life.

Dory (not her real name), put her dreams and desires on the shelf years ago when she became a wife and mom. She left college and got a well-paying job but ditched her dreams of a career in Human Resources. Twenty five years later, she found her routine job unfulfilling, but it paid the bills. She had struggled with her self-talk for years little inner voices always telling her it was too late to start over with something new; she was too old; she had a family that needed her, and she couldn’t risk their well-being. After years of soul-searching, wanting and desiring more meaning in her life and career, she made a conscious choice not to make any more excuses as to why she couldn’t live the life she desired. With my help, Dory set her intentions on making a fresh start in an entirely new career and changed the course of her life by reshaping the future she wanted for herself.

Searching for new meaning

To begin, Dory had to make peace with her choice to start a new career. As we discussed her career and life in depth, it was obvious that she had spent a lot of time and energy defining her dream career. I asked Dory to imagine what her life would look like with this new career. What would she have then that she didn’t have now? I went on to explain that she had to visualize what she wanted for herself so that she could create it right now. Finally, Dory stopped listening to the doubting voices in her head and instead listened to her heart. She knew that she had one more chance to change the course of her life by starting fresh in an entirely new career. The choices she made years ago no longer fit the vision of her new life.


Once she hit midlife, Dory could no longer ignore the desire to live-out her dreams. She wanted a career in Human Resources where she could train, teach and interact with employees the career she put on the shelf in her mid 20’s. I suggested that she assess her current skills and write down the gaps between her current skills and the new ones she needed in order to move into a Human Resources career. This exercise would help her to get a realistic picture of what she needed to do in order to close the gap between her current level and the education and skills she needed to fulfill her career choice. I recommended to Dory that she enroll into college immediately to complete the Bachelor’s Degree she started many years before. She moved quickly because she was determined to make the second half of her professional life more meaningful and fulfilling. I helped Dory to set goals with a timeline to complete a degree in Human Resources Management. Dory really liked her current employer, so I urged her to investigate career opportunities within before pursuing employment at other companies. Since networking is an important part of creating a career, I urged her to join the Human Resources Management Association where she could meet, network and share experiences with other Human Resources experts. I told her that it was important that she focused on taking excellent care of herself so that she could honor her health and wellness as she navigated through the challenges of making career and lifestyle changes. This would help her stay healthy and feel revitalized even in the most stressful times.

Creating a fresh new start in an entirely new field

Dory completed a Bachelor s in Management and quickly found a new job opportunity that had everything she wanted in a career; however, this also meant she would have to move away from her hometown; away from her family and friends. When the opportunity came knocking to leave her hometown, Dory initially panicked. Her current employer had moved their Human Resources Division to North Carolina and was seeking a manager for that location. I explained to Dory that she had to focus on the vision she created for herself; and more often than not, that means stepping out of what’s comfortable and creating something new. I asked Dory if she was ready to start fresh in a new career. I suggested to Dory that we end our conversation for the day and that she sit quietly with her eyes closed for about twenty minutes, taking in deep breathes and breathing out with her attention on what being present in her new life really means. I could hear the excitement in her voice when she called me the next day to tell me that she was ready to embrace the changes.

Dory jumped at the opportunity, applied for the job and was promoted. She moved and is enjoying her new career and active lifestyle. Dory joined a gym and takes yoga twice a week. She is also a member of the Human Resources Management Association (HRMA) where she meets, networks, shares experiences, and attends exciting and valuable programs. When Dory gets a little homesick she travels to her hometown, but she is comfortable with her new surroundings and is proud of her decision to take command of her own life and control of her future.

A second chance

Dory’s commitment to the Life Balance process paid off. She told me that she was truly happy with her new career and lifestyle. She got support which helped Dory to gain clarity on her values, enabled more meaningful choices and a consistent action-oriented approach to reclaim what she wanted most out of her career and life.

So now it’s your turn. You too can be just like Dory, and the many other examples I've listed. Instead of looking at midlife as a declining phase of life, you can embrace a second chance at a new career and progress through entirely new passages into lives of deeper meaning, renewed playfulness and creativity.

Now is the time for you to stop listening to those discouraging words, to stop giving yourself excuses. Now is the time for you to take control of your life, to start living a harmoniously balanced life on purpose.
It s time to create the life of your dreams!


Diane Randall is a Certified Wellness Coach & Self Care Expert, Workshop Presenter and Author. She speaks on a variety of wellness and self care topics related to professional women. To learn more about Diane's work, visit her websites at www.LifeAccelerated.com and www.haveitall.ning.com


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