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Taking Care of You
Self-contentment Leads to Confidence
By Lisa Martin 
Email laura@briefcasemoms.com
Aug 14, 2005, 22:32

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Being self-content means accepting and acknowledging who you are at your core and becoming satisfied -- maybe not perfect, but satisfied -- in all areas of your life. When you learn to better understand, better appreciate and eventually love yourself, you exude a quiet confidence that will open doors to what you want in life.

One way to develop a strong sense of self-contentment is to give yourself the gift of self-appreciation. Offer yourself the same respect and kindness you give to others you care deeply for. In doing so, you will feel more at peace with yourself, be strong in your convictions and easily stand up for yourself. Here are three ways to support you in becoming more confident.

1. Silence Your Inner Critic

Many women have a tendency to focus on what is "wrong" about themselves rather than what is "right." We tend to pick out and pick on the parts of ourselves we like the least. This disapproving inner critic (that little voice inside our head that points our faults and undermines our achievements) needs to be silenced. Instead of focusing on what you don't like about yourself, do your best to acknowledge and appreciate what makes you unique. Your smile. Your sense of humor. Your eyes. Now go further. What qualities define you as a person? Resist the temptation to criticize yourself. This is a learned behavior and it can be unlearned with intentional action.

2. Surround Yourself with Positive Environments

In order to remain confident or regain confidence, you have to ensure that you surround yourself with positive environments – emotionally and physically. This means cultivating friendships that enrich your life. A well-meaning friend that consistently points out your faults may be undermining your sense of self. Seek out people who care about you and can list all your lovely qualities instead. Fill your personal space with objects that inspire you, such as pictures of loved ones, keepsakes and favorite books.

3. Acknowledge Your Achievements

Like most women, you may have been brought up not to be boastful. However, there is a distinction between bragging and not recognizing your accomplishments and contributions. We have all achieved things in our lives, both big and small, personally and professionally. But oftentimes, we cross that achievement off our "to-do" list and quickly move to the next item, with little or no celebration. When you give yourself permission to feel positive about your accomplishments and refuse to listen to your inner critic, you will feel pleased within yourself. You will proudly share your wins, rather than apologize for them. You might even amaze yourself when triumphal works such as "I am one awesome lawyer," "I am the best mother ever," or "I rock" roll off your tongue with hardly at thought.

Watch out universe, here you come!

-------------------------------
Lisa Martin, PCC (Professional Certified Coach), is the author of Briefcase Moms: 10 Proven Practices to Balance Working Mothers’ Lives. She lives what she writes and talks about. A working mother with 20 years of corporate and entrepreneurial experience, she is the founder and president of Briefcase Moms, an international coaching and personal development company with a mission to “make it easier for you to live a balanced and successful life.” She helps female professionals, executives and entrepreneurs have an amazing career, family and life. Subscribe to her free newsletter at: www.briefcasemoms.com


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